Life's Calling, but can I respond?

I ask you, what are we doing in this world? Framing it slightly differently, what ought to be done in life? I have spent the greater part of two weeks contemplating this question and I have arrived at no reasonable answer. The following would describe the life of about ninety percent of urban Indian males I have come across - join school, maintain good to excellent grades right through school, join a college, finish graduation, take a job, get steady in a job, get married, have kids, buy a car or two, build a house, take care of aged parents, set the "life cycle" in motion for kids, retire, get taken care of by kids in your old age, then finally die. All without time to breathe in between. Minor variants in the life cycle include a trip to the US for completing an MS and going to the same country on a "project" to be completed for one's employer. Further, and rarer, variants include an inter-caste marriage and a tiff with aged (read as conservative) parents leading to an existence away from the latter for the most part of life. Nevertheless, the point I wish to stress upon here is that there is no change in the pattern of life for most people around. We are all slaves of a system that is unseen but whose tentacles can be felt by all of us, a system that is accepted without as much as a raised eyebrow. Even my classmates at the otherwise unconventional-thinking National Law School are as much in the clutches of this system as anyone else around. Decisions are made for us even before we are born, our life stories written out before we can take our first step in this world.

Some people (like Ajay for one) are well aware of the system and its oppressive regime. They introduce minor variants of their own into their lives, such as an apparent "don't care" attitude. However much they like to call themselves "rebels", I'm afraid they fall well short of that. Awareness of the system and going against the system (which is a rebel's occupation) are two different things. Smoking, drinking, doping - these seem to be the symbols of rebellion against the system for such people. Unfortunately, they have got it all wrong. The high that a dose of alcohol or a shot of grass gives is the quickest way to surrender to the might of the system. To strengthen my argument, I will use the anecdotal argument. I once asked Ajay if he can think of a while after college without a job. His eyes opened wide and he said to me, "You must be crazy. My parents would never allow such a thing to happen." Where is the rebel? A meek surrender to the greater power of the system. Mind you, Ajay is but one example of all those wannabe rebels who end up cowering before life as ordained by custom.

In such a system, what is the status of change? Not a very respectable one, I'm afraid. My recent wanderings through the Hospitality Club (http://www.hospitalityclub.org) have got me a new friend. She's from another continent, on the other side of the planet. During a chat with her, I told her about the life of an average Indian. Her response - wild guffawing - summed up what such a life is: A Big Joke. She asked me two questions, "What do you want to do?" and "Why are you afraid of doing what you want?" The first was an easy one, but the second has had me stumped. She was extremely amused when I said that I couldn't do what I wanted, and even more amused when I didn't have a better reason than, "Everyone else does this, so I have to do it too". I began to see her point. She's taking a break from her studies to go teach English in another country, and then will be taking another break to volunteer for the Olympic Games. If I so much as suggested this at home, I would be quartered by the wildest horses available. She made a simple suggestion - don't break studies, but don't take a job for a year after studies, use that time to volunteer in different countries. I discussed this with Anubhav in college. His response was typical - "Boss, you are mad!! Get a hold of your life, take a job, settle down and then think of all this tomfoolery".

The maverick that I am, I wanted some mental gratification. I Googled "volunteer" and this took me to exotic locales (virtually, at least) and showed me what Life could be. Given a choice, I would occupy myself doing voluntary work for the rest of my life. It's the best way to see the world, meet new people, discover new cultures and importantly, where my work directly and tangibly would help other people and the planet at large. My lower jaw dropped and touched the table top as I navigated through the pages of the volunteer-work search engine. This was life in all its glory in front of me. This is what would amount to disobeying the orders of the system. I repeat myself here - this is what I would love to do for the rest of my life.

But as I type this, I have in the back of my mind a fear that I will not make it to HLL...

Lessons learnt

At the risk of bringing private life into the public sphere again, I want to lay down in bullet points the lessons life has taught me over the past two years or so...

• Honesty is the best policy.
• Man proposes, God disposes.
• Everyone has a private space around them which is just that - private.
• One unspoken word succesfully conveyed says more than a hundred spoken words can.
• Above all, true love conquers all....

I'm afraid this is all I can lay down on my blog... Interested parties may drop me an email. I will not respond if you sound too nosy or if you are just being inquisitive or you are looking for a scrap of juicy gossip.